How do you know someone is Autistic?

Autism affects people differently depending on age and mental capacity. 

Some parents can detect signs of Autism in their children at their early age but some don’t get a proper diagnosis until later on in life.

On the 22nd of March 2 years ago, the BBC began broadcasting a family drama series called “The A Word” which focuses on a 5 five year old boy named Joe Hughes who’s parents thought he was simply an ordinary young boy only with some odd behaviour but during his own birthday party, his parents Alison & Paul seem concerned as their son does not wish to participate at his own birthday party and ignores everyone. 

Throughout the series, all TV viewers watch the parents grow into denial and acceptance that their 5 year old son has Autistic Spectrum Disorder. 

How do we know if someone has Autism?

All children, teenagers, adults and elderly people don’t always show visible or obvious signs of Autism but you can always by the patterns in their behaviour. 

Here is a list of the most common symptoms in Autistic Spectrum Disorder: 

  • Sensitivity to loud noises
  • Repeating the same routines
  • No acceptance in change
  • Emotional distress 
  • Spontaneous mood swings or outbursts 
  • Collecting specific objects or showing a strong interest in a particular hobby
  • Social anxiety (refusing to socialise with other people) 
  • Poor communication skills 
  • Trouble understanding consequences of inappropriate actions 

These are the symptoms that many Autistic people show and the whole idea of my non-profit charity is to spread awareness of Autism around the UK as many Autistic people always get misdiagnosed. 

I was diagnosed with general Autistic Spectrum Disorder and ADHD as a young child because I always wasted to be around my parents and teachers at school thought I was death because I wouldn’t speak and ignored them so my parents had me take a hearing test and everything came back fine but I still showed signs of odd behaviour so then my parents seeked help and advice from social services and children’s mental health services and there it was, I had classic Autism and ADHD.

But unfortunately as I grew older, I became a quick learner and my behaviour changed so I had a reassessment at a social care clinic at age 16 and an IQ test. My IQ was 101 and I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome but as soon as I went to live in independent housing with adult social care when I was in my 20s, psychiatrists and psychologists kept diagnosing me with “Borderline Personality Disorder” and it really frustrated me because I knew for a fact I didn’t have it because Borderline Personality Disorder is a totally different condition. 

Asperger’s Syndrome is a more complicated version of Autism as it means you suffer from mental illness as well as Autism and I fell into a deep depression at 13 years old because I was getting bullying at school due to my sexuality and weight, I was raped by one of the school bullies, my parents got divorced and my cousin was brutally murdered by tough street gang members and at age 16 I began struggling with fit in and make friends at college and I began self-harming and attempting suicide so my elder sister noticed that I had Asperger’s Syndrome and that’s why my mother had me reassessed by a social worker. 

My former psychologist from North London was very patronising and continued to diagnose me with Borderline Personality Disorder and then I was kicked out of my sheltered housing accommodation and placed in supported housing accommodation filled with severely mentally unstable people who carried around drugs and weapons and nearly every day I was accused of things I had not done wrong and got arrested. I was beaten black and blue by the so-called “support workers”, the boss of the company stole nearly £4k from my benefits and my mother finally informed my sadistic, egotistical, narcissistic CPN that I indeed have Autism and that she owns a statement from social services confirming it.

This is the problems with Autistic Spectrum Disorder, a lot of people make judgements, they assume that all Autistic are mute, twitch a lot, bite their hands and hit themselves but that’s not the case. NOT all Autistic people clap their hands, twitch or figit, bite themselves or other people, refuse to talk and punch their heads or slap their faces. This is merely a stigma and a stereotype. Autism effects all people differently based on their age and mental capacity. I am semi-independent meaning I can speak for myself and perform certain tasks but I am dyslexic, I cannot tell the time but an analogue clock only a 12hr digital clock, I can only cook easy or ready-made meals, I struggle to count money and have been taken advantage of, I struggle to keep my flat tidy and I find it hard to communicate with people and make new friends so I require supported housing by adult social care services. My mother has been taking care of me since my early 20s so I’ve never been able to do things by myself. 

I have a mental age of a teenager so I like collecting toy cars, actions figures, I enjoy playing with lego and reading comic books despite my legal age is 30 years old and I spend most of my time inside my flat using the internet or playing video games. Most of my good supportive friends are people whom I’ve met online because I struggle to make a conversation in person, if I do talk to people in person it’s usually paramedics, police officers, shopping assistants or elderly people because I feel more comfortable and relaxed around these types of people because I know they won’t judge me based on my looks or appearance and they’re easy to talk to. I find it hard to talk to my friends from school or college over the phone as I struggle make icebreakers or find topics to discuss and eventually end up with a mental block but if I talk to a family member it is easier because my family members know very well. 

So this is what Autism is like for me. It can be very frustrating at times but a lot of people think I’m cool and wouldn’t want me to change who I am and I totally agree with them.

(A photo of Steven Neary a man with Autism from North-west London who was mistreated by adult social care services) 

All images are provided by Google Images™ – Copyright is not intended.

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I was one of YouTube’s most hated members

Before people began subscribing to me and commenting nice things, I was actually one of the most hated members of YouTube.

I expressed a lot of opinions people disagree with, even now a lot of people don’t like what I say.

Why did people hate me?

  1. I admire Buddhist principles. 
  2. I support the Labour Party. 
  3. I dislike Chavs (aka Gangsters, Neds, Millies).
  4. I stood up for myself. 
  5. I am always correct.
  6. I embarrass other people. 
  7. I’m a fan of Gregory Jackson (Onision).
  8. I support charities (i.e. British Heart Foundation, Cancer Research UK).
  9. I uploaded reviews for TV soap operas.
  10. I’m original. 

People found these 10 old habits of mine intimidating and still do.

Why am I not a threat these days?

Mostly because I changed my username and because I am always honest, a lot of people respect honesty, I was brave enough to tell the world how I felt and tried my best not to let the negative feedback get to me. I once did snapped when I had a mental health crisis but I got over it.

Am I offensive?

Yes and no. The reason it’s a 50-50 answer is because I have different beliefs to others. It’s not that I actually want to offend anyone it’s because I will without even trying. I’m an antisocial, misanthropic, introvert proud supporter of the Labour Party, put me in a room with an inbred, extrovert, philanthropist Republican and I guarantee that a fight will break out.

Why do I despise Republicans and Conservatives?

Despite my European roots, I was raised in England by a working class family, England has always been a working class country. Theresa May and Arlene Foster are making England a duplicate of America but England is not America. Even Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II is embarrassed by our Prime Minister. Our Queen has always wanted our country to be fair and have equal rights. Labour almost won, if they had teamed up with the Liberal Democrats, there could have been more success. Our NHS is more of huge concern to me though but I am planning to donate to the NHS to help keep it public, if we go private, lots of doctors and nurses lose control of their salary, we’ll have to pay for our medical care and treatment. 

Am I a Buddhist?

Not at all, I consider myself a Zen Anglican Christian meaning I attend the Church of England, pray to God or Jesus and worship them but I just practice some of the Buddhists principles. What many people do not realise is that the Buddha aka Siddhartha said himself that he was not a God, he was a civilian just like us. Buddhism to me is just a lifestyle practice but many people have different opinions. 

Why am I very hostile?

I haven’t exactly had the best life, I mean I lost a lot of great friends I’ve known since school and then I lost a few family members too. A lot of people can’t see it but I have Asperger’s Syndrome (a form of Autistic Spectrum Disorder) so my brain makes me behave differently towards various lifestyle situations. I find it difficult to trust other people due to a number of unfortunate events. People have taken advantage of me, I was abused and hurt and trusting people is a difficult decision for me to make now. When you’ve lived your life in environment that makes you feel worthless and miserable, you automatically become hostile.

What are my goals for the future? 

I have once again retired from YouTube, I’ve also quit sharing my spoilers for Holby City and Casualty. I’m going to focus on what I do best: Art. I am going to make my own comic books again. I’ve never published any but I hope I get to someday and I want to share my profits with charities and the NHS. 

Autism Alliance UK now has a Facebook group

As you know, I have started my own free UK charity called Autism Alliance UK to help spread awareness for teenagers and adults with learning disabilities and mental illness and to help put an end to the stereotyping of the symptoms of Autism. 

Now AAUK has a Facebook group as well as a page. 

To visit and join the group please click this link here!

© Autism Alliance UK Limited 

Autism, you and the world

A lot of Autistic children and adults require a lot of care around the clock and mostly it’s their parents as parents fear the worse for their children. 

I have relied on my mother and sister most of my life all the way up till I was in my early twenties. 

When I realised that I was going to go in independent housing, I was terrified and scared, I knew that I wasn’t going to cope and it was going to be really difficult for me.

Shared accommodation with 24 support was great but I didn’t enjoy other people eating my food and drinking my milk. It was frustrating. I lived with two woman who never washed and if they did the bathroom was a mess and when I’d open the fridge freezer, I’d noticed half my food was gone and I’d get really upset. I was accused of many things I never did. 

As a young child, I never wanted to be away from home or my parents, I didn’t like socialising and I was terrified of new changes. 

As I got older, I observed people and their behaviour and slowly I learned from it and managed to adapt and adjust to the world, I learned how to curse at people when I was angry or frustrated, I learned how to look after myself whilst the house was empty, I managed to cope by myself but it’s still not enough as I still have care till this very day.

I was always a fast learner, if someone were to give me a brand new mobile phone, I’d learn how to use it within just 1 day. Telling the time has always been very difficult for me and I’ve only just figured out what it means when the hand is on a specific number. 

I look at myself and how I am now and then I look back at who I was years ago. I didn’t even knew what emotions were and what they meant, I never understood my behaviour and it’s consequences until I became more aware of life and observed everything myself and it was then I finally understood everything.

When people see me on a bad day, they instantly think “This person is a nutcase” or “This kid is just trouble” but really I’m just confused, scared, frustrated, worried and want help.

This is why I created Autism Alliance UK because so many Autistic people have been poorly mistreated and been potrayed the wrong way. I want the world to understand us a bit better and be more patient with us.

Yes life as a security guard in a hospital or a support worker in a social care organisation is a stressful exhausting job but there’s no need for aggression or violence, grabbing someone and restraining without talking to them is very terrifying, it’s scary, it’s what you’d expect from a terrorist not a respected authority figure of the public. So many times I have been thrown into police cells for accusations for things I have not even done wrong. The justice system is corrupt and the social care services has no conscience. 

How exactly should I explain to someone I have Asperger’s Syndrome? Should I wear a shirt with it written down? Should I take a letter confirming it around with me everywhere I go? Because that’s exactly how I feel in life. People think because you can speak up for yourself, because you’re aware of something, you don’t have any disabilities you’re just some spoiled brat. 

I want to remove the stereotypes, I want to make people see and understand that there is more to this condition then what they expect. The public expectations are politically incorrect and everything that is happening right now is very prejudice.

How can we make this right?

It’s not exactly rocket science, you just have to have an open mind and a kind ear that’s willing to listen. If you don’t have that then what much hope do we have left of this?

I understand that working or dealing with an Autistic person can be challenging but with the right intentions and more motivation, it can get easier and that’s what most people don’t realise. You need to learn and understand and you don’t need a degree or to become a specialist to even do that.

Photo credit: Google Images™ 

I was banned from a Mental Health support group for being Autistic

As we all know, social media networking sites such as Facebook has groups that support people with Mental Health problems and I joined one but as soon as I mentioned my free charity Autism Alliance UK, I was accused of spamming, advertising and trolling. 

A man named Stevan Elliot messaged me “Hi, no advertising allowed on my group”, I apologised and removed my link in my post but then he banned me saying “Autism is not a form of mental health, its a mental health group”, I straight away replied back telling him I have Clinical Depression, Post-traumatic Stress Disorder, Anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder which all four are mental illnesses but then he ranted that I was talking about Autism and said I was “trouble”. I told him I’m 29 years old and not a 5 year old child and that I don’t do online drama. I also told him that he was an ***hole and that he was really judgemental and I was going to expose him. 

This is a picture of the ignorant sod

And here pictures of his rude cocky messages. 

Now the b*st*rd is named and shamed. Luckily I joined another Mental Health support group that was accepting towards me and happily liked and followed my charity Facebook page. 

People don’t realise that Asperger’s Syndrome is one of the most complex and borderline forms of Autism, people with Asperger’s can have mental health issues too and Autism itself leads to natural anxiety. When I was a child, I would get upset each time I left home to attend school, I would cry if my parents were too long inside a shop or at a gas station. 

People who don’t know anyone with autism or doesn’t have autism doesn’t know what it’s like to deal or cope with the challenges in life. I was bullied by people for being Autistic on many occasions, I was called “spastic”, a “gimp” and a “spoiled brat” which is offensive towards Autistic people and is classed as discrimination. 

My non-profit charity

On the 18th of February, I decided to create my own charity to help spread awareness of Autism and to help put an end to the stereotyping of the symptoms. A lot of people misjudge people with Autism and often refer them as “spoiled brats” and I just got fed up with the abuse and choose to take action. 

I am an advocate for my own charity Autism Alliance UK. I don’t post on my Facebook page as often as I wish to as like everyone else, I have a very busy and social life.

So far my page has 11 follows and 11 likes.

What is Autism?

Autistic Spectrum Disorder is a mental development learning disability which is normally recognised from early childhood and affect’s the person’s lifestyle. 

Here are the most common symptoms. Some vary depending on which spectrum and the level of the person’s functioning.

  • Difficulty interacting or socialising with other people 
  • Minor speech problems
  • Easily irritated or is frequently anxious
  • Having trouble understanding or respecting boundaries 
  • Unaware of inappropriate behaviour 
  • May have a mental age of a younger person 
  • Suffers from mood swings if feeling misunderstood 
  • Self-harming (this can be in different ways, not all Autistic people hit themselves) 
  • Hyperactivity (This can still occur in adults)
  • Difficulty adjusting to new changes 

There are plenty of more symptoms but these are the most common symptoms people recognise. 

My Autism is at a High Functioning level of the spectrum, mine is Asperger’s Syndrome. 

What is Asperger’s Syndrome? 

Asperger’s Syndrome is a form of ASD but a more borderline or complex version. Some people with Asperger’s can seem like they may not have it as they have other problems added to the condition such as mental illnesses like Depression, Anxiety Disorder or OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) ect.

I have always had a support worker ever since I moved out of my mother’s house because even though I can perform some tasks on my own, I still require some help.

These are the following tasks I require help with. 

  • Keeping my flat tidy
  • Cooking a decent meal
  • Remembering to take my medication 
  • Being accompanied to appointments
  • Help with shopping 
  • Help with budgeting my money
  • Help with paying my bills

Living alone with Asperger’s Syndrome isn’t easy sometimes, people like me still need assistance. You see I have more than just Asperger’s Syndrome, I also have: 

  • Clinical Depression 
  • Post-traumatic Stress Disorder 
  • Anxiety 
  • Obsessive Compulsive Disorder 
  • Sinus Tachycardia 
  • Insomnia 
  • Type 2 Diabetes 
  • Irritable Bowel Syndrome 
  • Osteoarthritis 
  • Chronic Fatigue Syndrome aka Myalgic Encephalomyelitis 
  • Asthma 

So with all of those conditions along with my Autism, it’s definitely a hard knock life (referencing to the Annie musical, lol).

I was diagnosed with Autism as a toddler, I attended a mainstream primary school but I had behavioural problems and didn’t fit in with the other children so I was referred to a doctor, a child psychologist and a social worker. And because I had such a short attention span due to my ADHD, the teachers and my parents thought I was deaf and had me take a hearing test. After that, I attended Woodlands Secondary School (formally known as “Five Springs School”) a school for children with physical and mental disabilities. 

How do I cope now?

I have my bad days and my good days. It really all depends on the situation. If I feel like someone is not listening to me, I do get very angry and really upset. I use internet, video games, TV, music, food, drawing and writing as coping mechanism. 

Where can I find Autism Alliance UK?

You can find AAUK on my Facebook page facebook.com/AutismAllianceUK 

(Autism Awareness ribbon. This picture was provided by Google Images)